So this is a re-write on an earlier blog because I wrote it before to honestly get it out of the way, and now I feel like that's not really the point of blogging or BEDA so we'll call this a more successful take two.
The title this time is once again based on a song, and helps preface the long discussion that once again teaches me that I've been the same person I've been since I was 9 years old.
Didja guess the song? *squeaface*
I was on a short self-imposed isolation this week, for no real reason other than sometimes you need to clear your head to realize that everything was making sense in the first place.
Though having this iMode of sorts really allowed to me to appreciate some things and realize some others.
This week I talked with my fiancee about some of the most random things, and I feel like moments where I slow down and just appreciate our relationship are really some of the reasons why we're as strong as we are.
...then again we also talk about eating dirt and the time I got drunk and married the 12 girls band...
*crickets*
Moving on...
I feel like I can never really express to her how grateful I am for her, and blah blah blah-- sentimental stuff that's she's heard over and over and over again-- but really, I'm just glad she gave me my second chance.
Today we wound up talking about a time when we weren't together (which feels like years ago now) and we were talking about how one time back in November (I believe) I had a date with a girl I wasn't all too interested in (keep in mind this was a college date, it was on campus, I didn't pay, we used meal plans, I walked her back to her room after, and realized I hated college dating)...
It made me realize how much time can really pass in almost 2 years...
and yes, I know-- I'm not an idiot, I know that when two years time passes it has been about 2 years but when you look at it like this it looks crazy.
It's an interesting connection to follow when you look at a guy who went from heartbroken in 2007 to happily engaged to 2009 and all it took was:
- one failed long term "relationship"
- 2 failed casual dates with 2 girls (<--- ironically this was probably the same result of the guy who made "2 Girls, 1 Cup)
- one clandestinely jealous best friend
- a relationship
- a slap to the face (<--- told you it was a casual dating fail)
- a failed 2 month relationship that tells you that interracial dating is fine, the Irish and Swedish just don't mesh (inter-ethnic fail)
- an epiphany
- a relationship with my best friend that lasted 1 year and 5 days (<---- all amazing)
- and one surprise engagement in a time frame that only the Doctor could handle.
Sometimes I'd like to go back and warn 12 year old Pax that he's got a rocky road ahead of him, but he's got his own worries to handle
... after all
he's just found out he was rejected from Hogwarts and he's too busy in the backyard looking for the second star to the right (and straight on till morning...)
But I guess something stands true from the 12 year old falling off his footboard because Tinkerbell's not there yet to help him fly (<---- I think I might have just found a metaphor...woot) and the near 20 year old who has the same fear in the metaphorical sense... No regrets
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