They used to call us names now they want our autograph...(BEDA #15)

The lyric above was from one of my favorite songs in middle school-- you could call it one of the Pax essential songs for understanding my childhood, and it's a less severe motto that I live by now.

I'm not as elitist as I was at 13, but I'm still proud to be who I am, which is really the most I learned in school at that age anyways.

I'm going to cheat a little and give you a hint to the song because it's by this same band, and this song has been stuck in my head too



I actually used to think the above song was going to be the result of all my relationships-- because I used to be a cynic and a super geek (which should be a testament to how much I have improved)

I actually found a notebook when I was home last that had a very angrily scribbled lyric from the above song-- when I get home next I'll have to scan it so everyone can laugh at how dramatic I was when I was 12 and 13.

Today I'll give it one last try
and then I know I'll wonder why
I did it to myself once again
I saw your boyfriend he's 6'3"
Quarterback on varsity
the football players love to torture me
So I'm feeling like I'm not fitting in
I know that I'm not fitting in with you
And your stuck-up friends
I GET THE POINT

I look back now and laugh a little at the kid I was, I'm not so much different now but I think I've learned from a lot of my immaturity at that time-- also I've stopped going to Good Charlotte shows as well, which might have improved some of it.

To explain to all the younger people-- Good Charlotte was like a more badass version of the Jonas Brothers (albeit not the best comparison, but you get the point). They were on every poster, and t-shirt, and button, and had CDs dropping-- and then they kind of faded into oblivion.

If anything I can see this happening to the Jonas Brothers in two years, so don't be shocked by this-- the stereotypes you lead only last so long. In this case it was as soon as those 14 year old "rebellious" Good Charlotte fans realized that there's no sense in bitching and moaning about the kids who used to pick on you in high school when you're 25 years old.

I've been thinking a lot about high school lately which isn't so ironic-- however what is ironic is the frequency that high school appears in the music industry.

It gets hailed as the best time of your life/the worst time of your life depending on who you ask and I've realized now that I'm 2 years out of high school-- it's not really either.

I don't have much fond nostalgia about high school, but if you ask my best friend Ace he'll tell you about the parties he went to or the girls he slept with.

and I can tell you...

well I can tell you...

*thinks*...

I can tell you what was on TV, what books I read, what movies I saw, the concerts I went to, and I can tell you about how every day after I got my college acceptance letter I slowly went insane stuck in this weird hell hole. I can give no good advice for people who are in high school, I didn't survive it any better than most-- in fact I had a nervous break down sometime in Spring of 2007 and had to visit an in-school therapist who believed the best treatment for me was going to be behavior modifier drugs.

Needless to say I didn't listen to the offer to be medicated and realized there was one sure fire cure for what was going wrong.

College...

really, that was all it took... heading out to college stabilized me.

Getting away from my friends and family and the kids who tripped me in the halls, cheated off my tests, and threw things at me... basically they fixed every mental flaw.

I started reading this week and found that John Green has helped me find some of that old school nostalgia for times gone by, even if it's a little forced-- it makes me feel good to think that high school was something worth remembering and writing about.

Some people say they see themselves in Colin Singleton or Margo Roth Spiegelman...

I'm more a Q Jacobsen...and that's going to always be enough for me...

DFTBA guys...

and also, one more song-- just for nostalgia's sake...





^this was everything good I remember about high school. I wouldn't trade it for anything better.