White Moments As Told By A White Guy

What I'm going to tell you might shock, alarm, and appall you, so hold on to your hats:

I am White.

Yeah... I'm basically just messing with you guys, most of you know I'm pretty much the whitest thing since milk, paper, and white-out-- but those of you who also know me pretty well just said "Pax, you're not white, stop lying to these people"-- I know, I know... I can tell jokes too hahaha.

Basically I'm here to dispel this little thing called "White Moments" (which are similar to "Asian moments", "Black Moments" "_____ Moments"-- whatever applicable moment that is)

White moments are basically define as when anyone, mostly white people manage to take a normal situation between friends, family, acquaintances, classmates, and strangers and manage to have a white overload and have in turn made the moment a "white moment".

An example of one such "white moment" recently would come from a friend of mine's Plurk-- (full link can be found here)

White moment in 3--2--1...

OG MikeBz

I like chucks, they're awesome. I prefer Supra and Element shoes tho

bonudǝd i'm not white boy...

bonudǝd no*

Bopper what are ballys?

OG MikeBz These aren't really white boy: www.kicksonfire.com/wp-content/uplo...

bonudǝd i don't even know

Bopper ^ those are cool

bonudǝd yeah...i'm no white boy

NaughtyHaughty says AHHHHHHH "THROWS HANDS UP" STARTS TO SING......... CALIFORNIA LOVE........

bonudǝd Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west A state that's untouchable like Elliot Ness

NaughtyHaughty says The track hits ya eardrum like a slug to ya chest Pack a vest for your Jimmy in the city of sex

bonudǝd We in that sunshine state with a bomb ass hemp beat the state where ya never find a dance floor empty

OG MikeBz What do you mean by that? Doesn't mean 2 shit cents...

bonudǝd WHITE MOMENT!!!

OG MikeBz .... Wtf are you talking about? Are you on some dope trip?

jasmin. bahahah

NaughtyHaughty says LMFAO @ white moment haha

bonudǝd damn nigga, you're the only one that don't get it

OG MikeBz I get the idea, but.....why?

bonudǝd why what?

AkoSiMr.Pogi says I'm still laughing at the white moment <----(this would be the man behind the blog himself)

OG MikeBz thinks

this is turning racial.....

now for the test afterwards:

If you had to guess, which one of these posters committed the "white moment"?---

If you guessed OG MikeBz, you're correct-- and for extra credit I want you to point out all his white moments, this one I'll leave you to grade yourselves...

I don't mean to alienate this one guy, he really just happened to be the most pertinent example of "White moments" lately. I feel on a whole white people can start working together to help lessen the amount of white moments, or at least learn to laugh at them when they happen.

If you find yourself in a "White Moment" the steps for proceeding are:

• Recognize when and where the moment went from a regular discussion to a "White Moment"
• State something similar to the following "I just had a White Moment"
• Apologize for the "White Moment" to the other people in the discussion
• Move on
• Do not repeat!

If you don't follow these steps there are some more guidelines to follow as well:

• Allow people to call you out on the "White Moment"-- you deserve it
• Don't get mad-- you were the one who went all white
• Laugh along-- white moment are usually never over anything serious, so chill out and enjoy the moment of accidental humor.
• Don't follow up your "White Moment" with another one, you're just asking for trouble and you'll only wind up angrier.
• Do not confuse people calling out your "White Moment" as racism, that's just another "White Moment" and you wind up ruining the fun for everyone by pulling the race card at the wrong time and you wind up alienating and offending the other white people near you as well.

If you still don't understand "White Moments"-- then you are in fact having a "White Moment", so that should help explain it some more.

I was originally going to say that this whole thing was in jest and was not meant to come off racist or anything like that, but then realized that if you don't realize this is partially in jest, and not meant to come off racist, and is meant to be a humorous education-- then you are probably still caught in a "White Moment" and you probably need to read this over again.