Life's funny how it works out-- that's really the long and short about it. I could go on for hours, but really everything I'd ever need to say is summarized right there in that 7 word sentence (it's not 6, the grammar nerds will tell you why that is)
There are lots of things I'd like to say, and lots of things I'd like to say to her, but she's heard them before and by now there's no new ways I can tell her what's on my mind.
I suppose all I can say is this:
6 months ago I made a decision, a big decision-- it's the decision from which every other decision since has stemmed from. 6 months ago today my life changed for the better, hell it was kind of the start of my life-- the adult concept of it, not just the sentient being kind.
6 months later she still doesn't have a ring, we don't have an announcement in any paper, we don't have the same openness that other couples do, but through it all, she's still my fiancee-- and as I've told her a million times now, that will always be enough for me.
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My wife and I were emotionally engaged long before we were officially engaged. We started dating in college when I was 21 and she was 19. After a few months, we both knew we would get married someday, and we even had a good idea of when it would happen. She was planning to go to medical school ( which she did ), and we figured the best time for us to get married would be in the summer after her second year of medical school ( which we did when I was 26 ). However, before then, I wanted to make sure I saved up enough money to get her a nice engagement ring. I also wanted to pay off all my college and grad school loans before we got married ( I detest being in debt. I almost never take out a load, and when I do I pre-pay the loan as fast as I can. The one exception is my house, but we put 50% down on the house and got a 15-year mortgage ( 9 years to go! ), so we wouldn't be in debt for too much or for too long. ). So, as soon as I started working, I saved every penny I could so I could pay off my loans and buy a ring. I still remember eating a $2 container of chicken lo mein for lunch almost every day, and always having only about $100 in my checking account before I got paid each month.
ReplyDeleteI think that's our goal too, because I see no shame in a long-term engagement, because we've known for a while that we were going to be married, it's just a matter of the financial planning. There's definitely a lot of times I'd love to be impulsive and just be married already, but I think in the long run I'll be happier and we'll be more stable if we both work to a set goal first. The one thing I do know is that as soon as I have started back up my job again, the money is getting divided to handle my loans for school as well as planning for future stuff, because I've seen so many people who fight over money and ideally I'd like it to be less of an issue when we are finally a married couple. I imagine there are going to be lots of weeks where I'm eating peanut butter sandwiches and drinking tap water, but it's going to be so worth it in the end.
ReplyDeleteI have to say though, the planning for all of it is kind of exciting, looking at rings both engagement and wedding, it makes the future seem more real now knowing that we have something like this coming for us.